By Kusumanjalee Thilakarathna Family. Isn’t it such a comforting word? While you may go to school, for classes, play with friends, and associate with many people during the day, at the end of it all there’s a place you return to – home. And isn’t that where our family is?   What does a family consist of? You may say a family consists of a mother, father, and children. That’s right.   But is this the only type of family we see? What about a family which has one parent and a child/children? What about children who live with their grandparents? What about children who are adopted into a family? What about children who sometimes live with the mother and sometimes with the father? What about children who live with aunties, uncles, or older brothers and sisters? What about stepbrothers and stepsisters and stepparents?     These are all families too!   Family is the single most important influence in our lives. Family provides us with love and support. It helps us build values. In a family, we are each other’s teachers. We share joys and sorrows. We all share responsibilities within a family. As a child, your main responsibility might be performing well in school. And there can be other responsibilities like helping your parents or grandparents with their chores or taking care of a younger sibling or a pet. Just like that, every member of the family has their own set of responsibilities.    However, there is one main responsibility all family members share – to take care of each other and make sure everyone in the family is safe. All of this becomes meaningful when there is love. This doesn’t mean that everything is perfect in a family. There are times when we find it difficult to get along with our family members. Sometimes we get into little fights too. But what’s important is that even though we fight or have difficulties relating to each other at times, we find our way back to each other. There can be times when you feel a little left out or that you are not understood. You might feel angry or frustrated at times like these.   For example, let’s take an incident when you were punished and were feeling that it was unfair. Before getting angry about being punished, do a little bit of thinking.

• Think of the reason why you were punished
• Did you learn anything from it? What was the lesson they were trying to teach you?
• What could you have done differently so that you would not be punished?
• How can you show that you have learned a lesson and will be more responsible in future?

One of the main responsibilities of your parents or your guardian is to make sure that you are safe and that you develop a good set of values. Most of the time, this is the reason why they punish you when you do something that you are not supposed to do. As annoying as it is, it is done with good intention. They do not mean to harm you. Instead, what they are trying to do might be to make you learn and remember what you are not supposed to do. Maybe if you do not understand why you were punished, the best thing is to ask them how you should have done what you did, or why you were not supposed to do it. Then, if the punishment was unfair, they will also realise that and will not repeat it. After all, good communication is one of the most important qualities to have in a family.