• Universities Network 2023 Award winner for her work with children in armed conflict, attorney Marini de Livera on child neglect spreading across all demographics

With March being the International Women’s Month, this week we feature a super woman of an extraordinary level. Marini de Livera is a human rights lawyer, social activist, and legal scholar who took her calling to help the underprivileged and disenfranchised to new heights. She was recently awarded the Universities Network Award 2023 by the Universities Network for Children in Armed Conflict, for her sensitivity and commitment towards children in armed conflicts and difficult situations. A former Chairperson of the National Child Protection Authority (NCPA) and the Founder and Chair of Sisters-at-Law which is a free legal service to support survivors of domestic- and gender-based violence, de Livera provides her insight on often untouched topics about children and the dangers that threaten them. 

Following are excerpts from the interview:

Your award highlights lots of issues swept under the carpet. What has been the most difficult issue that you have grappled with?

The most difficult situation has been with a child who was being trafficked by her own mother. The mother was arrested and the child also went to prison with the mother. The child could not understand what was happening and when she was sent to an orphanage thereafter, she suffered secondary molestation. When I finally met up with the child, she was completely broken and could not understand why she could not be with her mother or see her mother. This child was only 10-years-old at the time. 

You have worked with children who have seen war and participated in war. What are your biggest takeaways from your interactions with them?

That it is possible to rehabilitate them. They need lots of love, care, empathy, and understanding, and there is no fixed mould or a ‘one size fits all’ approach when it comes to rehabilitation. Each child requires different kinds of therapy and different amounts of love, patience, and empathy. The Commissioner General of Rehabilitation has done a fantastic job with these children. I have participated in rehabilitation sessions where we have done a lot of art, dance, and drama therapy. Little by little, these children, who lived in a world of silence, danger, and fright, came out of their shell. Today, they are doing very well in life and have become productive members of society. 

There is no ‘one size fits all’ approach like you said, but, in general, what are the fundamentals in that rehabilitation process?

First, we try to get close to the child, because there is a lack of trust. When we visited the camps, the children there were initially very unfriendly, did not make eye contact, and were not willing to talk to us. However, with a lot of patience and using music and art, we gradually got them to trust us, come round to us, and work with us, thereby opening themselves up to healing. 

You said that the children go back into the community once they are rehabilitated. How does the community react when these children return?

This is a very difficult situation. We have to prepare the immediate family and the neighbours before the child is brought back home. We slowly establish bonds again, through a lot of street theatre, drama, and interactions. We encourage the parents and close relatives to visit the children in the rehabilitation centres before they are brought back home so that the child and the family become familiar with each other.

What have been the rewarding moments that you remember?

Once, when I went to the Hindu College to do art therapy, I remember the children hugging little dolls with broken hands and legs. There were children who were younger than 10 but there were teenagers too. I hosted a teddy bear project, where I went to schools and asked each child to donate a teddy bear to the collection. I gave each of the children in therapy a teddy bear and they gave their teddy bear a name, drew pictures of it, and told stories about their bear’s life, hopes, and dreams. This diverted attention away from their own problems and towards the teddy bear. They talked about what they wanted in the future and their dreams through the teddy bear. 

Can you share some learnings about the plight of children from when you were working at the NCPA?

We had a 24-hour toll free helpline – 1929 – and the largest number of phone calls came for children who needed care or protection. It was either a neighbour, a relative, or a teacher who had seen something unusual in the child’s life who would call and make the report. Unfortunately, at the time, there was no place to house these children who were neglected or facing abuse until we went to court and were granted a court order. For example, if a call comes in on a Friday, the child has to suffer until the next working day or longer, under abusive conditions, until we can get a lawyer and obtain a court order. So, I set up an emergency shelter when I was at the NCPA. After my tenure, unfortunately, the shelter was closed down. 

What role does poverty play in children’s freedom in this country and outside of it?

Children from all strata of society suffer cruelty, neglect, and discrimination. This is not confined to the children below the poverty line. However, poverty is one of the most glaring human rights violations that a child can face. Those suffering from poverty do not have a basic standard of living. Their human rights to education, food, clean water, a clean environment, interaction with others, to go to school, to dignity, and to self worth are all violated. Children are considered chattel, so, forced labour, forced prostitution, and sexual exploitation are regular threats faced by children who live below the poverty line. 

Are parents wholly responsible for what these children go through?

Eighty percent of parents are responsible for their children’s suffering. Parenting is not taught at any level. There is not even a booklet on parenting available. We still have children approaching us saying that their parents beat them up with canes or lock them up in dark rooms. These are situations that still happen in society and it is quite shocking. 

What are the common myths and misconceptions about children in armed conflict?

The biggest myth is that children in armed situations cannot be rehabilitated. Even some of those who visited the rehabilitation centres with me have opined: ‘This is a waste of time. These are baby terrorists’. People think that once people are recruited to an organisation or a movement, one is beyond redemption and cannot be brought back. However, this is not true. I have seen the training programmes that the Commissioner General of Rehabilitation organises and they are very good. The children were initially not responsive. In fact, they would pretend to faint so that they did not need to speak with us. But, after continuously working with them, they opened up to us. I used to bake cupcakes for them, sit with them, and have meals with them. We had a project where we painted saris together. Some international organisations brought musical instruments so that we would all sing and dance. There was a lot of painting that went on and I would see an inordinate amount of doves being drawn. We allowed them lots of freedom to concentrate on their creative pursuits, which helped them to come out of their shells. 

What are some of the things that you remember when working with these children?

When we met them at first, they were blank, like statues. They did not make eye contact. They were just breathing. They were not like normal children. 

Tell me about Sisters-at-Law? What inspired you to launch this and what have you learned?

My stint at the NCPA was very short. A year after I left the NCPA, I thought to myself that I don’t really need any governmental power to make a difference, so I basically started a shadow NCPA with the Sisters-at-Law organisation. We appear pro bono for children without funds, probe into the orphanages that have turned into chambers of horror, lobby for better laws, have a street theatre group, and even have a mascot for the group. We teach people about the laws of the country and the rights that people have through simple language and creative outlets. 

What do the children of war need the most from us?

They need love, affection, empathy, and community values. Community values refer to the bond between families and neighbours, where children feel like they belong both within their home and outside of it. These values need to be promoted. 

How does the trauma of war manifest in children, when they grow up?

If there is no rehabilitation, it steeps within them. They are very likely to be antisocial and angry with society and may even have a streak of violence in them, becoming perpetrators of crime. That is why it is important to welcome these people into the community, to show them a lot of love, and to include them in everything that we do. 

Having trained Army and public officials on human rights, are there insights that you can share about the line of thinking exercised by those in uniform and the people in the public service?

When these officials and service personnel come to us for training, they are very rigid and go by the book. My training sessions take them through role play, with many of them playing the role of the victim. I often tell them: ‘Now, you understand what it is like. You are humans in uniform and the people you interact with are also human. Professionalism is very important and the work ethic vital. You cannot discriminate. You have to be fair, reasonable, and you cannot take wrong orders from the top. You have to be a good human being and stand up for what is right’. I do believe that we make a difference in their mindset.

What do you think Sri Lanka’s youth can do to shift the narrative and give prominence to the protection of human rights?

In a day and age when Governments, multinational corporations, and international organisations have failed, the youth have a huge burden on their shoulders to be the change that they want to see. Firstly, they have to empower themselves and then they must develop empathy. Then, they must arm themselves with research, data and statistics. Next, they must find creative solutions to the issues at hand. They should also network with retired people, who have the experience that they lack and use that experience to formulate solutions. If all these groups come together and network, we are looking at change. 

(The writer is the host, director, and co-producer of the weekly digital programme ‘Kaleidoscope with Savithri Rodrigo’ which can be viewed on YouTube, Facebook, Instagram, and LinkedIn. She has over three decades of experience in print, electronic, and social media)