Narcissistic abuse is one of the most invisible forms of pain. It doesn’t leave bruises on your skin, but it tears you apart inside. You find yourself confused, anxious, and constantly second-guessing yourself. You ask questions like, “Was I too sensitive?” or “Maybe it was my fault.” But let’s get this clear: it was never your fault.
They made you feel loved at first. They showered you with compliments, attention, and warmth. You thought you found someone who finally saw you. But then came the coldness, the silence, the mind games. One day you were everything to them, the next you were nothing.
Gaslighting isn’t love. It’s control.
Gaslighting is one of the most painful parts. They made you doubt your memory, your feelings, even your reality. You would bring something up, and they would say: “That never happened.” Or worse, “You’re imagining things.” Slowly, you stopped trusting your own mind. That’s what they wanted. To keep you small. To make sure you never left.
You weren’t hard to love. They just didn’t know how to love without hurting.
After narcissistic abuse, many survivors are left with deep emotional wounds. You might feel empty, like you lost pieces of yourself. You might feel scared to trust again. Even friendships and kind people might seem threatening now.
That’s okay.
That’s your nervous system trying to protect you. You went through something traumatic. Your fear is not overreacting, it’s trying to keep you safe.
Healing doesn’t mean pretending it didn’t happen. It means learning to live without that pain ruling you.
You don’t have to rush your healing. Take your time. One day, you will stop waking up with that tightness in your chest. One day, you will stop hearing their voice in your head. One day, you will believe in yourself again.
Here’s what healing often looks like:
- Crying unexpectedly at random moments
- Being proud of yourself for saying ‘no’
- Learning to enjoy being alone
- Questioning everything, but still choosing yourself
- Feeling lonely, but no longer begging for love
Boundaries are not walls. They are doors you get to choose who walks through.
You get to set limits now. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone. If someone makes you feel unsafe, you can walk away. That is strength, not weakness. Boundaries are a part of healing. They teach your body and your heart: we are safe now.
Trusting yourself again is the bravest thing you will ever do.
They taught you to doubt everything, your feelings, your memories, your worth. But deep down, there’s still a version of you who knows the truth. Listen to that voice. It’s quiet, but it’s wise. It’s the real you.
You survived. That matters.
You’re here, reading this. That means something. It means you are already on your way. Even if you are exhausted. Even if you are not sure what comes next. You made it through something meant to break you. That’s not weakness, that’s power.
You don’t have to go back to who you were before. You are becoming someone even stronger.
You are not broken, you are healing. And healing is messy. Some days you will feel okay. Other days, you will feel like you are falling apart. But every tear, every step forward, every quiet act of self-care, that’s proof that you are healing.
You will laugh again. You will trust again. You will love again.
And most importantly, you will love yourself in ways you were never taught to before.